Forever
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Source: These screenshots from Shi ni Itaru Yamai, Soshite (‘Splitting of the Breast’), directed by Hideaki Anno, 1996
Sometimes I’m overwhelmed with the insatiable desire to learn. To know astronomy and geography and language and architecture; to recognize each constellation, planet, and star; to speak and understand all languages, be able to decipher ancient Greek and Latin text; to grow my understanding of how the human body works; study the differences and similarities of each religion; recognize the use for each herb and seed and sapling.
I want to better myself, not for fame or recognition or power. I just want to understand.
a gentle reminder that you did well this year. you met new people, learned new things and felt new feelings. you did so many things that made you scared. you picked yourself up off the floor after feeling completely defeated or heartbroken. there were some really tough nights but you survived them all. you made people happy just by existing. you accepted many goodbyes but the serendipitous meetings made up for them. it was your own hard work that paid off but you always downplay it or compare yourself to others. that’s not fair on yourself. you’ve come so far from the first day of this year. you have more wisdom and strength now. yes, other people seem more “successful” but does that even matter? please don’t think so lowly of yourself to only think about your failures. 2018 was your year of growth. I hope you take a moment to be kind to yourself, and believe that 2019 will be even better.
